Increasing rate of Living together in metros – are the parents of Assam aware?

The youth of our country who has always been inclined towards the alluring the western culture is now seen patronizing living together relationships with a volcanic affinity. And a huge number of those who have decided to go take part in this race are found to be from our very own Assam and other states of North East India. While many from our older generation would dismiss the concept as something like as fashion trend or clothing line, a better insight would reveal that the concept is far rooted below the obvious grounds of looking hip and modern.

Let’s start with own yard-Couples from Assam who are engaged in living together in the Delhi, Bangalores, and Pune.  The youth who comes to these cities chasing a career are usually burnt with survivals rashes through tough competition, pressure & stress to excel.  Most of them, since their childhood, have been pushed by their parents to win cutthroat competitions, which most of them merely managed to cross over. With these in the back, they strive to break free and achieve some freedom in a new city, and this freedom comes in different packs, size, and price– drugs, whiskey, lifestyle and now more recently living together.

Most of these couples tend to speak about the brighter side of living together, stating reasons like knowing each other better and fostering mutual understanding,- something which they could never test out in an arranged marriage. It seems they prefer this type of cohabitation, usually because of the following reasons:

a) Test the practical compatibility before they commit to a legal union!

b) To maintain their single status for financial reasons. In many cases the only the guy pays the rent.

c) They are in love so much that they want to spend quality time together. Who cares for it, while parents are not here to bind!

d) The no strings attached phenomenon.

However, these same couples are found ignoring certain basic hygiene of life and society. Couples obviously get physical in living together and with months and years, the sexual appeal diminishes. This, in turn, takes a huge toll in their future married life. Situations like unwanted pregnancy, abortions, destruction of health by using strong contraceptives haunts these couples in plenty, the regular scope of getting Heart Attack due to an excessive amount of Sildenafil citrate(sold as Viagra), not forgetting the nightmare of emotional and financial woes. Above all, the main purpose of the social institution called marriage gets threatened in the name of Freedom. However, the law too is now in favor of living together couples with the Supreme Court’s directive last year recognizing this concept.

A few days in places like the North campus, Motibagh, Munirka, Satyaniketan, Lajpat Nagar of Delhi will reveal the high number of Assamese couples staying as living together partners. The scene is the same in Bangalore, Mumbai, Pune and other cities. Even in Guwahati, such instances are growing with young unmarried couples, mostly from other places of Assam or other states of Northeast starting this new dimension. A student (name withheld) has been staying with his girlfriend for years now claims they like to be rebellious in nature, and so enjoy living together! For them –this is an act of rebellion against society.  There can be interesting questions raised on why the number of such young couples from Assam or Northeast is fairly high, while the number is significantly low for youth from South or central India, in spite of strong population count of such youth living in the metros. Is it that our Assamese youth tend to be different from the usual Indian culture (at the cost of own culture and customs) or is it something deeper, which needs expert research?

However, the most interesting fact about the increasing rate of Assamese couples living in metros is that the parents are never aware of their children’s actual whereabouts. As remarked by Anita Gogoi (named changed) student of DU, “I am living with my boyfriend since the last 3 years now, my parents don’t know about it. And I don’t intend to say so until we finally decide to get married.’’ Needless to say, this is because the older generation has not approved of this trend and believes in marriage. Most parents when they visit their children, travels with a planned date and schedule,– giving their child enough time to shift to a friend’s place temporarily. The truth, as a result, remains in the dark. The parents from Assam, whose unmarried son or daughter stays in Delhi or Bangalore, would shy away from a probability of their children doing a living together, the truth remains that many of them would be getting a shock of their life if they make a surprise visit!